Sunday, July 13, 2008

Work In Progress

So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image. (2 Corinthians 3:18)

Lately, I have allowed myself to be caught up in the busyness of life. I have let the demands of motherhood distract my heart from truly engaging with Christ. For this, my heart is heavy and sorrowful.

I am feeling unrest. I know the Spirit is moving and working on my life in unseen ways. I feel like I'm nearing the point of understanding what is going on within me, but God has not opened my eyes just yet.

I have gone through a vast range of emotions including consuming sadness, to fear, to abundant joy. I am delighted to learn from, and see the result of this spiritual work, yet so frustrated that I can't grasp it.

I have a deep longing to know and be intimately close to God. There are times when I feel in communion with God, and times when I feel completely detached. I am praying daily that these walls of stubborn resistance will crumble and allow me to run to my Savior wholeheartedly.

I have been soaking up words of wisdom like a sponge. Today, as Pastor Tim spoke in church, my heart was thirsty. I found myself wanting more. I could have sat there all day.

There is so much I don't yet understand. I know my life has a deeper purpose in Christ. Lately I have just been living. I know He will give me courage to fulfill His purpose for me. One of my biggest faults is that I try to do it all on my own. I don't ask for His help, which always leads to failure. Realizing this fault, however, and praying against it, is the first step toward progress. I'm walking forward.


erin said...

I thought Tim's sermon was fantastic. I have been feeling a lot of the same feelings as you. As Carla told me, "We're in this together. I love you."

Kara Jo said...

Love hearing your thoughts, Naomi. Yes, we are definitely in this together--you're not alone in your feelings.
I was impacted by Pastor Tim's sermon as well. It was one of those "ouch" ones for me.

NoOtherName said...

just want you to know that your transparent and sincere heart,
your persistent faith,
your heartfelt and warm words of comfort and concern...
all just really inspire and bless me.